The Best of Socks, The Worst of Socks
This is one of the best things about socks:
Sock yarn is so much fun. It’s not a big investment, like yarn for a sweater. Just one little innocent skein at a time, nothing you’d really notice.
Despite the title, I can’t say that this is a worst thing about socks, but it’s a bit of an out of control thing about socks:
Sock yarn is invasive, like Quackgrass or Zebra Mussels. You see, I can precisely pinpoint when I got my first sock yarn. I posted about it this January. Since then, I’ve finished three pairs and am a few rows away from finishing a fourth. But sock yarn has been creeping into the house when I’m not looking.
Does sock yarn chew skein-sized holes in walls so it can scurry inside? Can it squeeze through cracks no wider than a nickel? Is it donning protective gear to drop down the chimney? Dropping yarn seeds in the closet which germinate and produce more sock yarn?
It’s getting in somehow, that’s all I know.
I can’t really blame it. I mean, in the winter it’s cold outside and now it’s hot outside and it’s so much more temperate and comfortable in here.
This is a regulated moth-free zone, patrolled by guard dogs.
There are friends here, offering moral support and camaraderie.
So the sock yarn keeps appearing.
Before long, I looked up and discovered that there’s enough yarn in my stash for 28 pairs of socks.
That’s really not so terrible, is it? After all, not every invasive species is bad. Some, like sock yarn, are beneficial. Sock yarn is neat and tidy. It doesn’t have to be scraped off the sides of boats or blasted with weed killer. It’s nonpolluting, anti-discriminatory and obviously (from the way it breeds continuously) pro-family. It insulates any room it occupies and never leaves old pizza boxes around. It’s cheerful and pretty. Sock yarn is a good housemate.
See? We’re already back to the best of socks. Sock yarn serves many noble purposes even when it’s not being knitted up into socks. I may be slow about finishing my knitting projects, but I nonetheless feel fortunate to have such a useful stash waiting for me. It’s all the best of socks.
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